Thursday, September 26, 2013

Creepypasta: Monster Club Review

Creepypasta, reviews of horror to watch, games to play or other Halloween goodies. Creepypasta's real meaning is short online horror stories or urban legends.

The Monster Club

The Monster Club may have come out in 1980, but the music and directing seems right out of the 1960's. The best thing going for Monster Club is the actual Monster Club it takes place in with see-through coffin tables and music acts only good for Halloween. " I'm into a vampire girl, I'm such a sucker boy" , and other rocking music in between the anthology of horror stories. Vincent Price is our vampiric host as he tells his tales to a horror writer. Three stories based on a chart of different subspecies of monsters connects the tales. There all are a bit weird, whistles make cats melt. The last one based on The Ghouls is genuinely scary and a good reason never to stop and try new places.

The Monster Club suffers from having any real humor in it's bad jokes you have to sit through before each story is set up. Worse is the ending trying to say how humans are truly the worst monsters of all then going into a smooth Jamaican song sung by white guys about humans. Vincent Price ask for membership for his horror writer colleague and lists off all of humanities atrocities, way to end a movie. End the movie on all the real atrocities of mankind with poorly done extra monsters dancing too it.  If you want to see Vincent Price dancing with a fat women as a vampire for Halloween...you.. something's wrong with you.

Monster Club should have been blasted by whatever studio was in charge for some of the worst make-up and costumes on monsters in the monster club. Why the director chose awful masks when they proved competent in other parts of the film is astonishing.